Dear diary ... 

Today felt long but that's generally the way it is when you have kids with a stomach bug.

I told Abi today that I literally think it's my fault this belly ick hit because not more than two or three days ago I was thinking how amazing it was that we almost never have vomiting (from a virus) children here. And if in all our years here a stomach bug ever raged through, I don't remember it. I was thinking it in a thankful way but then today Lao threw up in the van on the way to school and then Abi messaged that Awa was throwing up. She'd already stayed home because her head hurt so it wasn't super surprising. Poor Awa spent the day throwing up intermittently but by evening seemed to be perking up a bit. She and Lao are both at Abi's house so we can try to isolate them from the other children. Abs has been a dear to spend her day looking after them in spite of their cooties. :)

We had a meeting today through Zoom that felt hard but also it went well. Sometimes difficult decisions have to be made and we struggle making them. We were thankful for the fellow missionaries that helped us work through things today. This week is full of medical stuff for one of our Thai girls and I'll spend most of Wednesday in the hospital for appointments with her. We're definitely hopeful for some helpful answers.

This evening I sprawled across my bed for a quick minute before evening worship due to fatigue from the day and I ended up sleeping through until 7:30pm or so. I had to force myself up because I've let our accounting spreadsheet fall behind and that's never good. I have my weekly meeting with Todd tomorrow to go over the spreadsheet and I wanted it to be all caught up. By God's grace, it is.

All the kids are in bed and I'm going for a few loops around the pond to settle my mind before I climb back under the covers myself. I use the cover more to keep the mosquitos from biting than because I'm cold. I'm defintely not cold. I'm trying hard to get to bed by 9pm each night but mostly it feels impossible. I'll keep trying, though. I know the efforts for better mental, physical and spiritual health I've been making are having God's blessing added to them. I'm so thankful for how personal He is.

The day got started early; much earlier than I had hoped. I'd gone out for a walk before dawn and gotten a mile or so in by circling the pond. But then I heard the familiar sounds of children scuffing along in the gravel. I accepted that my walk, and quiet, was over and I made my way to the sala that sits out over the pond. The children started coming to me with Bibles and their Bible reading plan papers we give them each Sabbath. They sprawled themselves around the sala benches, found the day's reading in their Bibles and then scratched out the answer to the related question on their papers. I signed each one in turn, evidence that they had, in fact, done it that morning rather than rushing to do the whole week's worth on the day the papers are to be turned in.

We're trying to teach the children to establish a habit of personal worship each morning and evening. We've modeled it for them over the years but in the past year we've been more intentional to "teach" it to them. For many of them it's still getting done because it's required. For others, it's becoming a part of their day they look forward to.

Leaving the sala around 7am, I rang the bell for the kids to start their morning chores. Barely had the tinkling of the small bell stopped sounding in my ears than I started to hear angry voices escalating into a fight inside the younger girls' room. One girl's things had been taken and she had a suspicion as to who'd done the taking. The accused didn't receive the accusation well and she stood, arms poised for a fight, voice rising to match her indignation.

Here we go again, I thought. How fun that they're fighting already. I gave them a few minutes to see if they could work it out without intervention. We've been working hard for them to know how to deal with conflict in a healthy way. Sometimes they nail it, other times they fail it.

Today was a fail and intervention was required. I finished supervising chore time, while periodically calling out to Charlie to stop screaming like he was at war, and then rang the bell for group morning worship.

And that's when the accused from the earlier spat remembered she was supposed to be angry. And she started to howl. And then the howls got louder and she settled into her anger with conviction. I placed a hand on her back and guided her through the crowd while throwing them my best fake-it-till-you-make-it smile. I walked her away from the worship gathering and over to the firepit where we have Friday evening worship. I got her seated on a bench, prayed with her (though my words were drowned out by her shrieks) and then let her know she wasn't to leave the bench until I came for her. I then walked back to the rest of the children until worship was over. Her cries slowly died down as she'd lost her audience and my patience regenerated as I gave God a moment to remind me why we're here.

The morning continued with breakfast and then a swap in shifts as Hannah took over for me while I ran some of the older girls to town quick and Robbie took two of the boys for haircuts. By soon after lunch, Robbie, Hannah, Abi, and I met on the porch of the girls house for our weekly meeting while the kids had quiet time in their rooms.

It was like an exhale, and while we talked and problem-solved and planned, we also laughed and enjoyed a reprieve from the childish drama that surrounds us.

Following the meeting and quiet time, the day continued very much as it had started. None of us know why the kids were in such sorts but it was hour after hour of this thing or that. We were all happy to reach bedtime.

When tucking them in for the night, the younger girls have all started to ask for us to pray with them individually, instead of over them as a group. After a long day, it takes grit to hang in there for that extra time before you can retreat for some peace. It's as awful to realize in the moment as it probably is for someone to read it. But feeling like you don't have the energy for something doesn't mean you don't do it. And in doing it, we always realize how sweet those moments are when their soft voices pray to a God they're sure can keep them from bad things in the night.

And He does.

I flipped off the lights and called out a final round of i love yous and I'll see you in the mornings and then I made my way to quiet for some rest.

Because tomorrow we get to do it all again.