Exhaustion mixed with euphoric joy. That's my current condition.
A stretch of holidays, a missionary camp meeting, incoming missionaries to get settled on campus, and my two oldest boys being here for a visit, my senses are maxed out. I'm a people person who has to de-people in order to recharge. Which is hilarious to me considering I live on a 9 1/2 acre property with roughly 30 other humans.
My house is like a tent in that there isn't a way to tuck inside where nobody can see or hear you. Even my bedroom doesn't have curtains at the windows because the house is so naturally dark that we don't want to shut any of those precious rays out. Our room is at the backside of the house facing an area that doesn't see heavy foot traffic, but we're finally at the point where I think we're at least going to get some sheers.
I find it increasingly amusing that if there's something that makes us uncomfortable or something that's 100% outside our skill set, God IS going to put it before us. He's clearly not interested in giving us an easy time; He's interested in stretching and growing us.
And growth is painful.
But He balances it with plenty of joy. Micah and Nik being here to visit is a gift I wasn't sure we'd get. The day they were flying, the Thai government changed the rules due to Omicron. They got in right before the process got more stringent again. And they got their golden ticket onto the plane (c*vid test results) right before they headed to their gate. God was very kind. It has been a blessing beyond words to get to watch my adult children interact together and with the younger ones. My heart needed it and I think all theirs did, too.
Missing Alexander but refusing to complain about it. God has His reasons and His timing.
This second week of this new year already looks like it'll be a busy one but we're going to try to keep it slow enough to soak in every possible moment with the boys. But we're also going to try to get back to some type of schedule or routine. We have two more missionaries coming to join us within the next month, God willing, and the whole campus will benefit if we strive for greater structure.
We aren't equipped with the know-how to establish the needed structure here for such a growing and diverse group, so it'll only be by the grace of God that any such thing is accomplished.
If we can just keep remembering to be thankful for every glimmer of that grace, everything will fall right into place.